Yearn to Learn

Upon returning from Russia after a two year mission living among the people and volunteering weekly at orphanages and childrens' hospitals, I was determined to continue the habitual service I had initiated. Thus the passion behind the budding nonprofit organization I started entitled, “Yearn to Learn.” Essentially this nonprofit will bring an educational model into the orphanages teaching orphans life and moral skills to aid their adaptation into society. This angled strategy is to ameliorate the cyclical problem of orphans having no marketable and family skills once they enter the ravish world. Below is the proposal I have written for “Yearn to Learn.” I will be living in Russian next year laying the logistical ground work of this nonprofit. If you have any desire to assist, please make note in the comment option at the end of this entry.

Orphanages in Russian are vastly overpopulated and the number of abandoned children has reached catastrophic numbers. As of January of this year, 600,000 children are under the care of the state in Russia. The number of children added to the system reached 113,000 this year, nearly double the number of orphans in 1992.

These statistics have been increasing yearly with no end in sight and consequently the end result is more orphans who leave the orphanages ill-equipped and ill prepared for reintegration and adaptation into society.

In order to ascertain and understand what societal organizations can do to help provide service in this most needful area, we want to learn first hand how existing programs work to combat this problem in Russia.

Our hope is that this extensive and unique research will eventually result in more effective NGOs, adoption agencies and shed light on how we can assist the tragic cycle of orphans in Russia once they leave the orphanages unequipped for life.

In order to learn first hand how existing programs work in Russia, I aspire to the following:

I will intern with a well-respected program entitled “Women and Children First,” under the facilitation of an established American NGO (MiraMed Institute - www.miramed.org – my American NGO in Russia that approves and is aware of what I am doing).

I will place myself in the system to learn and observe. I will not be doing direct research with, or on, any individuals. I will intern with MiraMed's professionals and become accustomed to their work.

My research will be based on course and curriculum evaluation of “Women and Children First,” my observation of their program and perhaps some limited involvement.

They have a great deal of crucial curriculum. By researching the program, “Women and Children First,” I will gain a greater understanding of how such current programs utilize their curriculum and how they work and interact with orphanages in order to prepare the orphan for integration into society.

This will help us in answering the question – How we can better address the tragic cycle of orphans in Russia once they leave the orphanages unequipped for life?

Our objective for this research is to make baby steps towards better understanding that issue.

Powder Nirvana

The sun's rays stretch out their arms towards the barren white ground as if to plea for help. The deep orange and bright yellow emit a kind of mystic mist that brings out the greatest details of each individual snowflake. Feeling the luke warm air wrap around me like a light, soft blanket, it brings a calm sense of comfort and relief. It's a different type of comfort, a "powder comfort" like knowing you are on the doorsteps of heaven and about to walk in.

From atop the high chutes and the south rim lookout, I scoped the layout of the drop, a glacially etched crater that appeared to have been played around with by the revered Michelangelo, with vertical rock bands and spines parceling potential descents like creases in a surrounding cascade of soft silk. Just chilling with my cousin, a local hard-core, he knew the snow and rock catches on a day-to-day basis. I watched as he hit the rocky drop, hard and frightenly fast, squeezing through shoulder wide chutes that had been absolute closeouts before the previous night's snow. All three mandatory ingredients were in place: powder, sunshine, and an uncut, fresh slope.

The six to twenty-four inches of pure white fluff and the warm sunshine was unusual for a February day. The steep 50 degree slope was sheltered from the ice cold mountain wind by old-growth silver fir and mountain hemlock. I adjusted my Oakley O's around my head, with my glove covered hand. The band gave my head a snug comfortable feeling of rush and adrenaline. On my left was a severe coulair that dropped off 1000 screaming feet. I sucked in the scentless afternoon air through clenched teeth then exhaled a warm cloud that streamed out behind me like a banner in the breeze. It was as though my body had suddenly become only an exterior shell against the cold as my mind pushed me faster, closer still to the mountain. As I looked to my right, I saw the tel-tale signs that signaled an animal had trudged itself to this spot. I couldn’t help but think of flying through the white, flying like the eagles overhead, slipping in and out of the low-slung clouds. Gazing around I took in one last glance of the untouched chutes and cornices, cliff bands and open bowls, trees and wind drifts. It had all the daydream ingredients for a powderhog like me.

The mountain was so spread out that forays for freshies made you feel like you were a part of the beautiful backcountry. I looked down at my navy blue boots and strapped them into my 188 El Camino K2 skies. Pushing off with my poles I felt like some angel was gently pushing me towards the ultimate ride. Up and down and up and down in the thigh deep white the continuous motion that was addicting and made your heart skip two or three beats at a time. Trees, cliffs, snow, it was all a beautiful white blur that forced a thrill that I had never felt before. Face shots for breakfast, face shots for lunch and dinner, it was something that I could live on forever.

Call it heaven. Call it nirvana. That moment when the whole great big wide world is shrunk down till it becomes comprised of only snow and a mountain and gravity and joy and you. And you experience the unique sensation of standing apart from yourself, watching, as someone who really, really knows how to ski takes over your body and carves turns like a divine being.

Within and Beyond Ourselves – the role of conscience in modern business

“This above all: to thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night of the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.” William Shakespeare

The following is an excerpt from Robert Gay’s convocation address for the Marriott School of Management at Brigham Young University in April 26, 2002. Robert is Managing Director and Senior Partner of Bain Capital and received his BS in economics at University of Utah and his Ph.D. in Business Economics at Harvard University.

You will receive appeals to pride, prominence, prosperity, and power. You will be tempted to aspire, accuse, contend, and covet. Every day in your job someone will try to convince you that it's all about the money, but it will not be in those exact words. It'll be more like: "I got a 10 percent raise. What did you get?" or "I can't tell you how great getting the beach condo has been for our family." Others of you may find that you can't get the job or advancement or make the sale unless you pay some person some small favor or unless you join their party or club. And, as you protest the unfairness of the situation, there will be three or four others ready to take your place. Still others of you will feel emotionally empty from the loneliness of the road or the stress of the day and will find that, away from home where "nobody else will know or find out," there will be innumerable age-old invitations to fill that void. These calls to choose self over conscience will be endless.

At the other end of the spectrum is the need to guard against self-righteousness. You may recall the story of the disciples who Christ rebuffed when they complained to him—with what the scriptures describe as "indignation within themselves"—about the oil that was being poured on his body and how much better it could be used if sold to help the poor (Mark 14:39). This should serve as a reminder to each of us that when we go about our daily labors without the Spirit, ends and means can become confused, even when more noble aims are intended. What may seem to be good can actually end in unnecessary frustration and even harm.

Acts of the self-centered mind are a goodly part of the beat of modern industrial life and are like the "salutations in the marketplaces" referred to by Christ (Mark 12:38), which will always both flatter and tempt you. They are the very practices and challenges that so often make business a demanding world of raw selfishness aimed at ever-increasing profit. If not courageously resisted, this commercial environment will work to deafen you to all other voices. It will blur the lines between moral and legal correctness and try to make you doubt, compromise, or set aside your values. The recent events at Enron are a powerful witness to this very outcome.

Indeed, the Enron example alone should impress on you forever that you will not be able to stand if you rely solely on your own reason or desires. The more subtle reality—less visible to most—is that if you knowingly or passively accept your environment without question, just roll with the humdrum of the marketplace, or even if you rise to admired public reputation or exceptional Wall Street success, it will not matter because inwardly you will be conflicted. You will be unfulfilled and at odds with yourself because you will not be where you are supposed to be but rather in a spot where you risk your very soul. All my experience tells me this is so, and I can't even begin to tell you how many self-justifications you will be able to find to put your own voice over the voice of the Spirit. I believe President John Taylor saw this when he spoke: "It matters very little what we are engaged in; it is impossible to do right without the guidance of the Almighty."

Heraclitus (Greek Poet, Philosopher)

“The soul is dyed the color of its thoughts. Think only on those things that are in line with your principles and can bear the full light if day. The content of your character is your choice. Day by day, what you choose, what you think, and what you do is who you become. Your integrity is your destiny . . . . It is the light that guides your way."

Wild Daisies - A Poem

If you love me
Bring me flowers
Wild daisies
Clutched in your fist
Like a torch
No orchids or roses
Or carnations
No florist's bow
Just daisies
Steal them
Risk your life for them
Up the sharp hills
In the teeth of the wind
If you love me
Bring me daisies
Wild daisies
That I will cram
In a bright vase
And marvel at

*Inspired by my good friend Reija
who is an example to me

Long Walk Part of Gift

Continuous effort -- not strength or intelligence -- is the key to unlocking our potential." Black Elk

The African boy listened carefully as the teacher explained why it is that Christians give presents to each other on Christmas day. “The gift is an expression of our joy over the birth of Jesus and our friendship for each other,” she said. When Christmas day came, the boy brought the teacher a sea shell of lustrous beauty. “Where did you ever find such a beautiful shell?” the teacher asked as she gently fingered the gift. The youth told her that there was only one spot where such extraordinary shells could be found. When he named the place, a certain bay several miles away, the teacher was left speechless. “Why...why, it’s gorgeous...wonderful, but you shouldn’t have gone all that way to get a gift for me.” His eyes brightening, the boy answered, “Long walk part of gift.” – Gerald Horton Bath

“Vision with out effort is daydreaming, effort without vision is drudgery, but vision coupled with effort will obtain the prize.” Thomas S. Monson

Go Get It

“Don't be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

Struggle for Understanding

Disclaimer: Every age is decisive. This is just a more specific perspective from a mid- to late- twenty year old.

I just had an interesting conversation with a friend about the pangs of being at such a decisive age – mid- to late- twenties. We have many decisions to make that will highly impact the remainder of our lives. We must choose a career, we must choose a spouse, if the opportunity exists, and we must further define who we are and what we want. This truly is the fundamental, foundational “make or break it time.”

My friend mentioned how he is struggling with what he knows to be true in his heart as opposed to what he is beginning to doubt in his mind. He mentioned that he is doing all that he knows to be true but is not seeing the results as he feels he has been promised. This paradox for him is causing major internal strife and raising doubts.

After hearing him express, I began to realize, that we are all the same. In other words, we all are experiencing struggles some how in some way. It is true what Henry B. Eyring said; when you meet people and you assume that they need help, you will be right 95% of the time. We all are struggling in some way and if we cannot admit that fact, then we are being very ignorant. Our struggles do not have to be drastic, dramatic or unbearable, it can be anything – of course we should not forget the power that be for us, is SO MUCH greater than the power that be against us.

When we look at people we need to be incessantly striving to see them as a perfect person sees them so that we can see things as they really are not as they appear to be. Think of how much more compassionate you would become when you realize that behind that cockiness, that pomp, that confidence, is a very natural man who needs help just as much as you do – the sooner you realize that he or she needs help, the better off we all will be. Look around you. You will see people that will cry and have cried, will laugh and have laughed and pray and have prayed without a clear answer to their prayers (then how important is a testimony and a sharing of experiences etc.?!).

Imagine if you could hear everyone’s supplications to heaven . . . I think we would all realize that we are really not that different from one another . . . after all; are we not all from the same Father?

Life is amazing and life is rich. Life is real and life is hopeful. Life is what you make it.

Students for Children

A special annual orphanage fundraiser brought to you by the BYU Slavic Club.

Since the fall of the Communist regime in the former Soviet Union, the economic stability of its fundamental organizations has faltered considerably. Throughout the Nineties, the Russian people suffered greatly because food, warm clothing and paying jobs were scarce. By 1992, Russia was at the helm of one of the worst economic depressions in Russian history. Russians were penniless and helpless, unable to support their families.

Consequently, with the rise of poverty in Russia also came the catastrophic influx of orphans to Russian, State-run orphanages. Due to the massive increase in children admitted to the orphanages, the government simply could not provide for all the needs of the children and many were forced to do without the basic necessities. Thousands have died and many more are enduring the consequences of inadequate nutrition, poor living conditions and severe lack of education.

Today the struggle to support the children left to the state has reached horrific proportions; the yearly number of admitted orphans has more than doubled since 1992. The Russian government, despite its noble efforts, cannot provide sufficiently for each child’s needs. Furthermore, the needs of the children have grown. Many are afflicted with aids, cancer and other debilitating diseases, whose parents leave them to the state because it is their child’s only hope of recovery; the costs of health care are prohibiting them from helping their own children.

The BYU Russian Club, however, refuses to give up on the lives of these children. Having enjoyed the blessings our country has to offer, we believe we can make a difference to the innocent children, currently suffering in Russian orphanages. This year our club has decided to begin a new annual fundraiser called the Students for Russian Children Fundraiser, in an effort to gather sufficient funds to aid orphanages in Eastern Russia provide the necessary items for the children to help them through the long and arduous winter.

Our Goal

Through correspondence with representatives in Khabarovsk and Vladivostok, we have learned that the children are in dire need of winter clothes, especially warm coats and boots. These items in particular are outside the scope of the orphanages’ budget and therefore it is our desire to make sure that these children have adequate clothing to make it through the harsh Russian winter.

Our efforts to gather money to help the children are two fold:

(1) Our "Students for Russian Children" Talent Showcase on Friday, February 24th, 2006, will be an event designed to raise both money and awareness of the current plight of Russian Orphanages. For more information click on the link at the end of this post (BYU Slavic Club).

(2) We are also talking to our friends, neighbors, families and local businesses for donations toward this great cause.

Your Role

With the help of private donors and the money we receive from the Talent Showcase we hope to raise funds in the thousands to go toward helping Russian orphanages. Whom we are able to help and what we are able to supply will depend greatly upon the donors.

If you have any desire to help these children, please send your donations to:

Students for Russian Children
3112 Joseph F. Smith Building (JFSB)
Provo, UT 84602

Make donations out to "Students for Children"

For additional information, please visit the BYU Slavic Club website

First a Father then a . . .

A new study for Fathers: shared activities key to father-child connection:

BYU and NDSU research explores how dads connect with their children

The most significant way for fathers to connect with their children is through participating in shared activities, according to a new study from researchers at Brigham Young University and North Dakota State University.

The study is published in the current issue of Fathering, a journal of theory, research and practice about men as fathers. Of particular mention were activities that involved recreation, learning or working together.

"How fathers connect with their children is both important and interesting," said David Dollahite, co-author, and professor of family life at BYU. "This research provides a window to look at some of the specific ways in which fathers connect with their children."

After conducting in-depth interviews with fathers concerning their relationships and the dynamics of how they connected with their children, five central themes emerged:

· Personal involvement in shared activities

· Expression of support and care to ill or anxious children

· Interaction with children at birth or adoption

· Shared exchanges of time and affection

· Participation in spiritual activities with children

The most significant pattern that emerged was the personal connection created by fathers participating in shared activities with their children. The activities discussed most frequently by fathers were:

· Recreational activities (camping, hunting, picnics, playing ball)

· Play or learning activities (hide-and-seek, checkers, word games)

· Work activities or attending important events together

"Men feel close to their children when they are doing things together that are fun, engaging or focused on learning," said Sean Brotherson, lead author and assistant professor and extension family science specialist at NDSU.

Connecting with a child was expressed in situations ranging from playful wrestling to teaching a child to hammer in a nail.

"The key was doing something together, not just talking, and this seemed to make possible periods of companionship, such as sitting around a fire together, and moments of shared enjoyment, such as catching a fish or reading a book together," Brotherson said.

Participants in the study shared many experiences that had a strong impact on their relationships with their children.

One participating father said, "I mostly think of the little times, such as when he wanted to play soccer and we went over and played soccer a while. Afterwards he just kept talking about all the things that he learned playing soccer. He really talked about it for a long time, and it really made me think, 'Boy, that must have been a neat experience for him.' To me that is nurturing, spending time and doing things so that it is a meaningful experience for him."

According to Brotherson, these connecting moments shared by fathers seem to exist as windows of time in which the distractions of a hurried schedule or busy lifestyle are blocked out and they can focus on feeling close to their children. "This is all the more important when families today are faced with too little time for each other and they end up feeling overscheduled and under connected," he said.

The research contains several father narratives related to each of the five central themes.

"The other findings from this study, whether reflecting a father's spiritual activities with children or shared moments of laughter, all point toward the tremendous value of building positive connections as a father," said Alan Hawkins, co-author and BYU professor of marriage, family, and human development. The voices of these fathers share a message of positive possibilities for healthy experiences of connection between fathers and their children."

Happiness in the mountains of Nepal - thanks to my cousin extraordinaire, Logan Dance.

Happy Now So Happy Then

“The habit of being happy enables one to be freed, or largely freed, from the domination of outward conditions.” Robert Louis Stevenson

Substitute “thing” with what you want . . . .

A few months ago, I was in hot pursuit of something that I valued tremendously. I constantly told myself that if only I were to get that thing I wanted then I would be happy. It made so much sense. I know how big this thing was and I knew that it made others happy when they got it so it must be the source of their happiness. I envisioned myself with this thing and it made me happy.

Well, as fortune would have it, I actually obtained that thing I so wanted. And surprisingly to me, I was relieved, grateful, peaceful, but not comparatively happier.

After reflecting on this phenomenon, I came to the self-reflective conclusion that the state of my heart had not changed and it wouldn’t change no matter how implausible the thing I wanted. In other words, I could have won the lottery, a new pair of skis, received a 4.0 and it would not have made a difference on my heart. Sure, after obtaining this very good thing, I felt an alliviance of pressure off my shoulders, I felt peaceful and grateful but the state of my heart had stayed the same.

How ever you are happy now, will dictate how happy you are then. You must find a more constant source of happiness. You decide to be happy now. Good or bad may come and it may come hard and fast. Other things may change but your heart will stay the same.

“Obviously there is a great difference between feeling happy at a given moment and being happy for a lifetime, between having a good time and leading a good life.” James Faust

“I may not be able to eliminate pornographic trash, but my family and I need not buy or view it. I may not be able to close disreputable businesses, but I can stay away from areas of questioned honor and ill repute. I may not be able to greatly reduce the divorces of the land or save all broken homes and frustrated children, but I can keep my own home a congenial one, my marriage happy, my home a heaven, and my children well adjusted. I may not be able to stop the growing claims to freedom from laws based on morals, or change all opinions regarding looseness in sex and growing perversions, but I can guarantee devotion to all high ideals and standards in my own home, and I can work toward giving my own family a happy, interdependent spiritual life. I may not be able to stop all graft and dishonesty in high places, but I myself can be honest and upright, full of integrity and true honor, and my family will be trained likewise. I may not be able to insure family prayers, home evening, meeting attendance, and spiritual, well-integrated lives in all my neighbors, but I can be certain that my children will be happy at home. They will grow strong and tall and realize their freedom is found at home, in their faith, in clean living, and in opportunity to serve. As Christ said, “And the truth shall make you free.” No virtues in the perfection we strive for are more important than integrity and honesty. Let us then be complete, unbroken, pure and sincere, to develop in ourselves that quality of soul we prize so highly in others.” Spencer W. Kimball